Reflections on God's Long Winding Road for a Family: An Ethiopia Adoption Story

Paul and Deedra Mager will be traveling in Ethiopia beginning February 18, meeting and finalizing the adoption of their son Ashenafi. But before they left, Deedra paused, looking back on her journey to her fourth child who was waiting for her overseas.

Tonight I am feeling reflective of our journey to this point. I have not actually used this blog to journal many of my emotions regarding our story. I guess I was mostly just tracking dates and keeping in touch with my new friends in the blog-world! However, tonight, I just feel like I need to lay it all out there. So, here goes...

The Road Begins - International Adoption

Everything began when my sister and brother-in-law gave us some land (2 acres adjacent to their farm) so that we could build a house. Around that same time, our hearts were stirred for international adoption. Through a series of circumstances and much research, we decided in the spring of 2006, jointly, that we would all go together to bring home our new sons. We applied at Children’s Hope International into their Vietnam program and hoped to actually travel together.

My brother-in-law had the idea of selling the land to finance the bulk of both of our adoptions. We were totally on board, feeling like it was a huge gift, either way; and as we believed God was calling us to international adoption, it seemed like an answer to prayer. I felt so strongly God was going to have to finance this thing He was calling us to do, since we were already struggling to make ends meet due to lack of funds in my husband's ministry. With no savings and too much debt, we started down this road and downloaded the application from Children’s Hope.

The day I had to send off our $100 application fee, my husband ran into a local pastor friend at the gas station, both on their way to work. Our friend handed him a $100 bill and said he felt like God wanted to bless us with that. It was exactly what I needed that day and I had to worship, knowing that God was assuring me He would be there for whatever I needed each step of the way. So, after a bit, we sold the land (my brother and his wife actually ended up purchasing it!) and it was just in time for all our initial home study and government paperwork fees. So far, so good!

A Fork in the Road – Which Country?

When my sister and her husband decided to accept a referral for a baby from Guatemala, we were overjoyed for them and fell in love immediately with our new nephew. However, that left us wondering what we should do next. We looked into Guatemala a bit, but didn't feel that was the right door for us to walk through. I became increasingly uncomfortable with Vietnam, unsure I had heard the Lord on from which country we should adopt. We put our home study on hold. It was completely ready, just awaiting the country.

Throughout November and December I felt nothing. I was really praying, too! Finally, as January 2007 rolled around, I decided I had to put a deadline on things. I told the Lord that by the end of the month I would put something down and just send it in, regardless. The third weekend of that month I had a revelation as I was talking with my sister. She asked if I had noticed Children’s Hope was opening a new program for Ethiopia. I looked into it and immediately felt this was right. The needs of the country, the beauty of the children, the cost, the timelines, the short length of stay in country (since I had 3 children at home, this was important to me), and the excitement of being one of the pioneer families for the program were all perfect! We switched programs, sent off our home study and within one month had our 171-H form (INS clearance) - the same weekend of my birthday and the same weekend Children’s Hope received their licensing for Ethiopia!!!

I got to work on our dossier and made sure to submit it before we left on vacation in June. We were the 3rd or 4th family to submit a dossier. The first 2 families, requesting infant boys, and another family, requesting siblings, actually traveled before the courts closed in August. So, we were sure we were next on the list and would be receiving our referral any time and traveling by October at the latest. Well, that didn't happen. Several other referrals came through, but all for older children or siblings or infant girls. I was excited for all these families. However, I kept waiting for the call.

A Change in Direction

Finally, it came in October. We received a referral for an infant boy and were thrilled. However, we immediately realized we were going to struggle to get the necessary funds together for the country/referral fee. Several of our friends gave generously to us and one long-time friend of our family gave us a loan so that we could go ahead and process the referral to get on the list for a court date. God was good, once again!

I believed He would come through on the funds we owed to them, as well as the money it would take to travel. However, we had one setback in the plan. When our court date came the Tuesday before Thanksgiving, we found out the court had not ruled in our favor. For reasons I will not go into here, the court could not separate the baby from the birth family. We felt some loss with this news, obviously; but also felt that it was an answered prayer. We believe the court had ruled righteously in their decision and we tried to be at peace in that.

We were on hold again. Children’s Hope told us there was another infant, but could not give us any specific news yet until they finished the medicals and paperwork for him. We waited one month with no more information. Finally, on Christmas Day, the director of the program called and gave us the news! She emailed all the medicals, photos and background info on Ashenafi and we were overjoyed she would take time out of her holiday to do that for us. God gave us a beautiful Christmas gift! The baby was perfect!

The Guide Steps in With a Helping Hand

Now, we awaited a January 23 court date. This time everything went beautifully the first time through. Again, the hurdle of the finances came to weigh on us as we contemplated the cost of travel. As we were waiting for our official travel dates, we received a notice from Shaohannah's Hope (Steven Curtis Chapman's adoption-assistance organization). We were awarded a $3,000 grant!! (This is something we applied for in the early fall!) God is soooo good!!! Plus, my husband had a friend give us some money for our trip and a side job he was working was going to pay exactly what we needed for the hotel/food cost with enough to take some cash with us!

So, now, we are ready to go! I'm going to totally enjoy this experience and immerse myself into the culture of Ethiopia and loving on my baby!

All in His Perfect Timing: A Russia Adoption Story

God’s timing is perfect. We knew that in our hearts, but it was hard to convince our minds sometimes while we were in the adoption process. A rollercoaster of emotions...our adoption story began in March 2006 after my husband and I attended an adoption seminar and felt in our hearts international adoption was the way we wanted to start our family. In November 2007 on our 8th wedding anniversary we got THE call. What a gift! An infant girl in Izhevsk, Russia, was ready for us to meet her. We would be the first family with Children’s Hope to travel to this region so there were many unknowns.

My husband and I packed our bags and went on the journey of a lifetime. In an orphanage in Votkinsk we met our precious gift. Her name is Ksenia. The orphanage director brought her in the room. She was smiling and looking around at all of the faces in the room. She was and still is a very happy child. My husband described her as beautiful and I couldn’t agree more. We only saw her for a couple minutes that day.

The first trip was very busy with documents and such, but we were able to visit with our daughter several times before we had to come home. It was so hard to say goodbye! The only consolation was that we could replay our camcorder and flip through photos of her, taking us back to when we were together.

We were home for exactly a week when we got the call that our court date was set. We couldn’t believe that our adoption was finally happening!

Our second trip went very well. We visited our daughter for a couple of days prior to the court hearing. To our delight she remembered us from the first trip and it felt like we hadn’t been apart. She was babbling more this time and was crawling even faster.

Court was long, but the outcome was all that we wanted to hear – that she was officially our daughter. After the court hearing the judge who seemed to be pretty harsh during the process, said the books are closed for this hearing and then I couldn’t believe what she said next. She said:

"People do not believe in miracles anymore, but they still happen. This is the first of many miracles for your family. December will be a celebrated month as it is your husband’s and daughter’s birthdays, your adoption day, and Christmas. Winter will be special for you as New Year’s is in January as well as your birthday. Miracles still happen.”

In my heart, I felt like that was not the judge’s words, but our heavenly Father answering our prayers.

The next day we were able to finally hold Ksenia in our arms, not to say goodbye, but to be able to take her with us. Our flight home was five days before Christmas. What a Christmas gift! We are so blessed. We celebrated Ksenia’s first Christmas in our hometown of Fort Worth where she met many of her family. We also were able to celebrate her first birthday as a family in our home in El Paso. God’s Perfect Timing. We couldn’t have dreamt for it to be better. During the process, my adoption consultant shared this scripture with us and it was something that we drew strength from: I Samuel 1:27 – “I prayed for this child, and the Lord has granted me what I asked of him.”

It has been two months now that Ksenia has been home with us and we don’t remember how life was without her! She is a beautiful, happy 13-month-old who loves to sing, dance, and be outside when the sun is shining.

Everyday is a new adventure with her. We learn something not only about her, but also about ourselves. Everyday we thank God for her. Our prayers have been answered in ways we couldn’t have imagined.

--Danielle Riddle, TX

Danielle and her husband Jason adopted 1-year-old Ksenia from Izhevsk, Russia, in November 2007.

The "Call": A China Adoption Story

The anticipation can be excruciating. You hurry, hurry, hurry to get all your paperwork completed for your very important dossier and then you wait…wait and wait some more.

When adopting internationally, getting “the call” makes for a very memorable day. First you cry, then you ask for specifics about your child, then you call your spouse and/or family members and then you wait again. The referral package will come to you with wonderful pictures and medical information on your child. Whew!! Now that is over; when do I get to travel??

I can remember this day like it was yesterday. I received two ‘calls’: one when we adopted our first daughter from China in 1996 and then again when I adopted her sister in 1998. But this story is not about my ‘call’. On November 5, 2007, some very dear friends of mine got “the call”. Since they live in St. Louis, the whole family came into Children’s Hope headquarters to get their referral.

They did have to wait though. The medical had to be translated and other paperwork made ready before they could actually come in to see their beautiful daughter. It was only a couple of hours, but I am sure it seemed like a century.

How did this all start, you ask? Dear friends Karen and Curt Miller, along with their daughter Lauren, had just returned from China with their little girl and sister, Katie in May 2005. This family goes to my church and their daughter is in my daughter’s class. When they began their adoption process, the wait time from paperwork submission to referral was 6-9 months. Tom and Jeannette Eskridge were so smitten by Katie that they started the process, too. Tom and Jeanette have two sons, Kevin and Connor, and they wanted a little girl to complete their family.

For those who know, it’s not necessary to say - the wait time kept getting longer, longer and longer. I would see them at church and they would ask if I had heard anything. Even though I work at Children’s Hope International, I couldn’t tell them when they would get their referral - I did not know! Like Karen and Curt before me, I would have to say, “Just wait. God will bring your daughter when it is meant to be.”

I could always see the sad and frustrating looks on their faces when I told them this. When Tom and Jeanette started the process, the wait time was 7-9 months. Their paperwork was received and entered in China’s system on December 5, 2005. December 2006 came and went and they still had no referral. I think the wait for their baby sister was just as difficult for the boys. They were 9 and 12 years old when they began thinking about having a baby sister in the house, so they were old enough to have the same anticipation as their parents.

It got to the point when the wait was almost unbearable since everyone always asks, “When will you bring your daughter home?” This question is always said with good intentions, but when you have lots of friends and family asking, it can seem like you get asked every 10 minutes. Tom and Jeanette decided to try and relax and not talk about it very much. This is the typical course of action if you want to keep your sanity while waiting.

The first Sunday in November, I attended a baby shower for the family along with lots of friends from church, the kids’ school, and her friends and family. Yeah, you can guess what everyone was asking: “When will you get ‘the call’?”

As it turns out - the very next day. On November 5, 2007, exactly 23 months from their paperwork submission to China, the Eskridges received their referral of their daughter Kayla.

I was so thrilled; I couldn’t wait for them to come in to see her picture. They pulled the boys out of school and came into the office to ‘get their referral’! As you can see in the pictures, it was exciting for everyone.

Tom, Jeanette, Kevin and Connor traveled to China over the Christmas holidays and came home with Kayla on December 29, 2007. Most people wouldn’t want to be away from their families at Christmas, but what better Christmas present could you have than to be finally holding your precious daughter that you waited so long for?

Congratulations to my dear friends!

-- Pam Bischoff works for Children’s Hope International in

the St. Louis Office.

A Merry Christmas to All

During our 2.5 year wait for Nate, the holidays were the hardest for me. I kept thinking, "Will this be the year we get to see Christmas through the eyes of our child?" The answer was always "no"...until this year. We have much to be thankful for and the biggest thing is bundled in a 23lb package. This is how God answered our prayers for a child...

You prayed for help when we found out we needed $15,000 in adoption fees. He answered your prayers by providing us over $16,000 in just 3 months! He went beyond that by bringing many people together during the fundraising weeks.

You prayed that our baby would be healthy. Through Children’s Hope, God gave us a BEAUTIFUL, healthy 10-month-old boy. He is in the 90th percentile for height, is average weight for his age and the worst he had was a little cold.

You prayed that he would adjust to his new life easily....God answered you by helping Nate bond to his dad immediately and adjust to his new home within 3 weeks. He never had night terrors or bad reactions to new food... He enjoyed being with us and has slept through the night since day one.

You prayed that WE would adjust to our new life as parents... God gave us an easy child...a fast learner who helped us get into a routine quickly, professions that allowed us to be with him, and understanding/ patient friends and family who helped us during those crucial first few weeks.

Even through the long wait, Nate came to us at the right age, at the right time in our lives. Any sooner and we would not have received him. Not that we wouldn't have been happy with another baby...but we are glad that we have our son. He was worth waiting for.

I am so excited about Christmas this year. As I was unpacking all our decorations, I came across the stocking holder that we had bought over 2 years ago for our expected child. Each year it sat up on our mantel empty, but this year, it will hold our new son's stocking of goodies.

He is the best Christmas gift we could have ever received. And because of that, we named him Nathaniel, which means "Gift of God".

--Don & Denise Sullivan, AZ

Pictured on the left: the Sullivan's son Nathaniel. Pictured on the right: Denise Sullivan as a baby in 1968, during her first Christmas. “Now, almost 40 years later, my son gets to celebrate his. And wouldn't you know it? They still make those little Santa suits.”

Iliya’s (and Mommy’s) First Days of School

A hesitant little boy walks in the classroom with his mother holding his hand. He is the first child in the classroom that morning and his mother helps him take his raincoat off. He looks at his teacher, back at his mother, and—realizing that he is here to stay again—his face crumples. His mother bends down to give him a hug.

Mother: It’s okay, you will only be here for a little bit and then mommy will come back to get you. I think you will have fun playing with your new friends. Now...give mommy a kiss.
Boy: (blows kiss at his teacher)
Mother: (laughs) You’re such a cute & silly boy! Alright, now, tell mommy ‘bye-bye’!
Boy: (waves at the teacher) Buh-bye.

That was our morning; Iliya really was ready to go on to work with me and not stay with his teacher. However, that wasn’t an option. Adopted from Russia in July 2007, Iliya was not too keen on leaving his new mama every day. So I gave him one last kiss and a hug before leaving him with his teacher to get acclimated to his classroom. I made my way back to my office and down to the business of wading through more emails and papers that had accumulated in my maternity leave. It was a fairly calm (and productive) morning at work.

The rooms of our daycare are equipped with state-of-the-art observation booths, complete with one-way glass and a listening system. Using the booth as my shield, I checked on Iliya once that morning. After playing in their big multi-purpose room, his class was back in the classroom, and he seemed to be doing okay.

The newness seemed to be a little stressful for him—he would play for a couple minutes, become serious, cry for a few seconds, play for a minute, be serious for a few seconds, play, cry...and so on. But his cries didn’t seem to be a really tearful cry; he just really had his serious face on when I was observing for those few minutes. His teachers were paying attention to him—talking to him and engaging him in play.

When I went to pick Iliya up after his lunchtime, most of the other kids were napping, and he caught sight of me as I walked through the door. He grinned the biggest grin, called out to me, and began dancing in circles before running up to me. It was precious. But I had to tell him to “shh...” because all the other children were trying to sleep!

As the week progressed and Iliya realized the permanence of school, drop-offs became a little more difficult before they got better. Although he didn’t want me to leave in the mornings, he would calm down rather quickly and would be so excited to see me in the afternoons—a sign of his solidifying attachment.

We have thoroughly enjoyed having Iliya in our family. He is a blessing to us in so many ways—ways in which we never imagined! As it turns out, child care has been a good thing for our family. My husband and I are both able to work in jobs we enjoy while Iliya is also playing hard and improving his social and language skills. We have a great child care team working with our family. And most of all, we have a God who is good, looking out for us every day.

--Melissa Bridges, Alabama

Daddy's Girl: Attachment and China Adoption Story

We had waited almost two years for this moment. I was only able to sleep for a few hours the night before. My husband Lance, our 9-year-old daughter Madeleine, and I were in Changsha, China to hold our little Leah for the first time.

After a twenty minute bus ride, we arrived at the Changsha Adoption Center. We were ushered into a large waiting room where all of our adoption group took seats around the perimeter of the room. Soon after, Chinese women carrying babies began coming in the door. As our adoption coordinators started calling family names, I looked across the room and saw a woman holding Leah.

I recognized her instantly from her referral pictures. As we waited for our name to be called, I was brought to tears as others in our group received their babies. When our name was finally called, Leah was brought to us by her nanny and handed to me.

Leah immediately started bawling. After about fifteen minutes of hard crying, she fell asleep in my arms. Our joy was slightly clouded as we watched the display of grief in Leah’s nanny. She could not stop crying as she watched us with Leah. We were told that she and Leah were strongly attached.

When we arrived back at the hotel room, Leah had awakened and was crying again. In the next two hours, she latched on to Lance, and would not let him go. She would not let me hold her or come close to her. I was not at all prepared for this rejection. I had never even considered it as a possibility. I told myself that all would be well the next day.

After a night of sleep, she once again only wanted Lance. We had to make another trip back to the Adoption Center to take our oath and legalize the adoption. It was hard to watch all the other moms holding their babies in the lobby, on the bus and at the Center, while I could only watch Lance hold Leah. When we returned back to the hotel, I was an emotional disaster. On top of my sadness, I began to feel a little angry at the situation.

How could this happen? How could my baby not want me? I had already successfully mothered Maddie, whose love for me is immeasurable. How could this happen?

That night I knew I needed help, so I made a long distance phone call to Brenda Barker, the Southeast Director of Children’s Hope. She explained to me that Leah was rejecting me simply because I was a female. Leah was not ready to trust another woman, given that the female she had always loved and trusted had just left her. Lance was different from her nanny on all counts, so Leah felt that maybe he was a safe bet.

Brenda told me what to do to get in Leah’s good graces. I should be the one to do the fun things, the things that she liked. If there were things that she didn’t like, let Lance handle those. She wanted me to always be the one to feed Leah, even if Lance had to hold her while I fed her. Lastly, Brenda said that we would see a different girl in three days.

She was right…each day Leah looked less sad, cried less and allowed me to get a little bit closer. By the end of the week, we were starting to see Leah’s happy personality shine through. Her eyes came alive. Leah then finally allowed me to hold her. It was pure heaven!

By the time we came home, I felt rather foolish for having worried. Lance had been so wonderful through it all. Leah is now playful, silly, bright, sweet and very loving but most of all we are grateful that Leah had a nanny who loved her fiercely and who taught her how to love.

--Amy Wilson, Tennessee

Shared Heritage

Just like all the other children in his hometown, Rob Slaubaugh was a “farm kid.” Growing up on his family’s wheat farm, just south of the Canadian border in northern North Dakota, meant working alongside his dad in the frigid north winds of winter and in the heat of the long days of summer. He loved his family and he loved his life on that farm; “I can’t think of a better place to grow up,” Rob said. It was a life that started out in a much different land.

Tami Herman grew up in the Midwest, the daughter of two educators. She, too, has fond memories of her childhood in smaller communities of central and eastern Missouri. And like Rob, Tami was displaced from her birth country.

It was in early 1974, only a few months after they were born, Rob in Saigon and Tami in Southwest Vietnam, that they were flown to the United States, like hundreds of other babies in war-torn Vietnam, to be adopted into their new families. During his childhood, Rob says there wasn’t another “Asian kid for two counties.” He vividly recalls, however, a time when playing high school basketball, his team met another school team that also had a boy of Asian descent.

“My parents were good at helping me understand my culture,” Rob said. “Mom would even occasionally cook Vietnamese food.”

Tami was in more of a culture battle with her mom. She wanted to blend in and not be “singled-out”, while her mother attempted to keep Tami’s birth heritage alive. “I hated the Asian dolls given to me and even threw away some traditional dresses that came with me from Vietnam,” Tami remorsefully remembers.

A huge point of contention surfaced when her mother insisted that Tami attend a playgroup for Asian children. Tami was pushing against her past. But it is that past that brought about a wonderful future for another orphan from Vietnam.

As she matured in high school and college, Tami started embracing her heritage. And in late 2005, at 32-years-old, she and her husband Jason decided to start a family.

“It was a natural for us to pick Vietnam. It allows us to celebrate and continue my heritage,” Tami said. She felt she would make the perfect parent for a Vietnamese child who needs a home.

About that same time, Rob and his wife Amanda were making the decision to adopt from the country of his birth. By the end of 2006, both Rob and Amanda and Tami and Jason received their referrals—a baby in Vietnam was waiting for both couples.

Rob read in the referral how his new son was abandoned at birth in a Ho Chi Minh City (Saigon) hospital just like him. Tami, meanwhile, would be traveling to an orphanage in Kien Giang Province in southwest Vietnam to adopt her new daughter. This was close to where Tami was born.

In late April, both couples traveled to Vietnam.

Tami and Jason were accompanied by Tami’s dad, Larry David.
“We stopped by the orphanage our first evening to see Olivia,” Tami said. “She cried the whole time in my arms. When I took her home the next day, then it sunk in. All these emotions were running through my head… She was so precious.”

On the same day, up in Ho Chi Minh City, 2 ½-year-old Benjamin Slaubaugh was reluctantly meeting his new parents for the first time. “I was a little worried about what kind of emotions would surface when we arrived in Vietnam to adopt our baby,” Rob said when contemplating the similarities of how their lives began. “We share where we came from and an understanding that God had a plan for us. My parents prove that you don’t have to have the biological ties to be a strong family.”

The Herman homecoming, 13 days later at St. Louis’ Lambert Airport, was a flashback for Tami’s dad. It was 33 years ago, in that same airport, that he held Tami for the first time when she was escorted to the United States from Vietnam. She was 3-months-old.

“My mother is still so excited. Everyday she says, ‘We are so blessed. We have two beautiful girls from Vietnam. How special is that?’”--written by Cory Barron - Children's Hope Int'l

Published in the Children's Hope Newsletter, Fall 2007

"The Call", Waiting for a Sister and a Daughter from China

Two years ago on April 18th, our phone rang with some of the most wonderful news! It was referral day for our family and several others...on this day we first heard about a little baby just 10-months-old waiting for us in Fuling, China—a city we had never heard of, but now knew held a very special piece of our hearts.

It was the day before my husband’s birthday and I was home checking emails when I started to notice referral announcements starting to come. I called him and told him that he might want to come home a little early. Although he didn't make it before the phone call, both of our sons were here and very excited about their new baby sister.

Dianne Atteberry from the Kansas City office, as soon as I picked up the phone, said, “IT'S A GIRL!” She shared with me the beautiful name given to our daughter—Fu (name from the orphanage, means blessed) Ai (love) Yu (canopy of heaven). Our daughter’s name truly means what we felt then and what we still feel now....blessed, loved under the canopy of heaven!

From that amazing day until now, I have seen a very beautiful, quiet little baby turn into a beautiful, very talkative, very active little girl. We have been blessed to have seen and experienced a lot of her "firsts"—her first time crawling, her first steps, and her first words. I tell people often that I am so amazed at what she has been able to do in just a little over a year and a half. She can crawl, walk, jump, talk, color, sing, eat, play with EVERYONE, almost completely dress herself, put her shoes on the correct feet, go potty and she thinks she is a third grader! She goes into her big brother’s class and they have a chair her size, she hangs up her coat, and sits down waiting for the pledge and then proceeds to color or read a book. If we happen to be there when it is time to take the class to the restroom or go out for recess or lunch, she will line up just like them. It is very fun to watch!

I hate that we missed the first smile, the first tooth, the first roll over and the first time she sat up by herself, but truly feel blessed to have experienced everything else! To CHI, thank you doesn't seem to be enough to say to each of you for helping us bring our daughter home! Our family is complete and we are blessed to have had such wonderful people holding our hands and walking with us through this process.

For those of you waiting for "the call", it will come!!! I'm sorry each of you has to wait so long, but know that it is so worth it!

--Crystal Kovach, MO
The Kovach's blog: http://afterchina.blogspot.com/

Top 10 Things Learned, First "Mama-versary" for Russia Adoption Family

Last year on this date we arrived home with Delaney! What an incredible year with an incredible baby girl! Within about 30 minutes of being home, she had toys and shoes everywhere, tried to open the kitchen cabinets, hugged/tugged the cat, re-programmed the remote and made herself right at home. I can't imagine life before she came!

To those of you waiting...your adoption will happen and you will be with child soon!

Top Ten Things I Have Learned as a Mom ~ Year One

1. Anything you SAY can and will be repeated.
2. Baby proofing? HA!
3. Any toy or object can and will be used as something other than its original purpose.
4. Cats don't like to drink from a sippy cup.
5. Anything you DO can and will be repeated!
6. Two year olds like to lock doors.
7. Every word to every Wiggles song, every word to every Ralph song, the entire Sound of Music score, the entire score to Mary Poppins, every note to the Jeopardy theme, and all the words to Three Dog Night's "Joy to the World".
8. Broccoli has excellent trajectory.
9. A bath can bide you enough time to make a phone call and/or have a glass of wine!
10. No matter how it is said, whined, shouted, screamed, yelled, whimpered, whispered...."Mommy" is the sweetest word in the world!!!

--Cynthia Ramsel, CA

(Left) One year after Delaney became Cynthia's daughter through Children's Hope International adoption, they celebrated their "Gotcha Day" with swimming at a kids-only water park. Afterwards, Cynthia gave her this turtle sandbox gift. It was a huge hit!

Colombia Here We Come!

When we stepped foot off the plane, I knew we had entered a different world. A world of strangers that spoke a language that we did not completely understand. A world of armed guards and cautious people. As we made our way through the airport, getting through customs and the baggage area, I wondered if Andres, our driver, would actually be there to pick us up. What if he forgot?

He was there, smiling and holding a sign that read “Howell.” You can’t imagine the relief to see a smiling stranger waiting to take us to our home for the next few weeks. Once we loaded up the car, we were on our way to El Refugio, a small bed and breakfast that caters to adopting parents. We reached El Refugio around 11:00 p.m. and went straight to bed.

Laying there in bed, I finally had time to stop and reflect on the day and what tomorrow would bring. Tomorrow I would be a mother. I would meet the little boy who I had prayed for and dreamed about for so many months. I would meet my little Jordi.

The morning finally came. What should I wear (like Jordi really cares what I am wearing)? What baby supplies should I pack in the diaper bag? What paper work do we need to bring? Oh my goodness, in a few hours I am going to be a mother!

Meeting Our Little Angel

David our young, friendly interpreter came to pick us up and drove us to ICBF (Colombian Institute of Family Welfare). Once we got through ICBF security I looked at my surroundings. It wasn’t exactly what I had in mind when I thought about meeting my son for the first time; it was just an office building. As I looked around the room we were waiting in I saw pictures of other families who had once been waiting in this room just like us.

My heart was about to pound out of my chest, when were they going to bring Jordi in? Did they change their mind? Had they forgetten our appointment? But they didn’t forget and they didn’t change their mind. The door opened and in walked a woman carrying our little baby. She handed Jordi to me and then everyone left the room except for our little family of three. I held him tight and started to cry. I looked up at Kevin and he had tears in his eyes. Jordi on the other hand was not crying, thank goodness. During the most intense, sentimental moment of our lives, Jordi felt that he should offer some comic relief. He spit up all over Kevin and me (I mean all over). When the ICBF staff returned, we were still trying to clean up.

The case worker explained Jordi’s eating and sleeping habits and asked if we had any questions. We then signed some papers and became the temporary guardians of Jordi Andres Vivas Cardenas.

On the ride back to El Refugio, Jordi slept in my arms (Colombia has no car seat laws). My dream of being a mother had come true.

Life in Bogota

So life was perfect. You would think so, but in reality it is scary to be a first time parent, much less in a foreign country. I was so happy to have Jordi, but I was also very homesick. I missed my family and friends. I wanted them to be with me. To help with Jordi and to give me advice on being a parent. Kevin was so strong; he kept our little family going. I was scared to be alone with Jordi at first. I had been around kids my entire life, but nothing prepared me to have one of my own. What if he cried and I couldn’t help him? What if I was not feeding him enough or feeding him too much?

As the days passed, we got into our routine. We started learning Jordi’s likes and dislikes and bonding as a family. I got to where I could call home without crying. And we started enjoying our surroundings.

We wanted to embrace life in Colombia while we were there which was easier for Kevin since I just wanted to take Jordi back to Fleetwood, North Carolina. We would take walks and play in the yard of the bed and breakfast.

Everyone at El Refugio was so caring and patient with our family. They helped me with Jordi and gave me emotional support. They went out of their way to make us feel at home. They even went all out for Thanksgiving (turkey, pumpkin pie, the works) even though we were the only American family staying there at the time.

The day finally came for us to go home. I was excited, but still sad to leave my temporary “family” at El Refugio and the country of Jordi’s birth. After saying our goodbyes we headed back home.

No Place Like Home

I had prepared for the worst when it came to Jordi’s adjustment to his new home, but luckily he had no problems. He showed no fear when family members crowded around him oohing and aahing. He loves to be around people, especially other children. He is showered with attention from the entire family, especially his grand parents and his Aunt Courtney.

Jordi turned one year old on April 21st. Of course we had a big party where he got way too many toys. As we held Jordi up to blow out his candles, tears filled by eyes. I had waited for a moment like this all my life. That moment, like many of the moments we have had with Jordi, was perfect. Everyone says that Jordi is so lucky to have us, but Kevin and I know that we are the lucky ones. We were given the blessing of being Mommy and Daddy to our precious little boy.

--Makisha Howell (wife to Kevin, mother to Jordi), NC

Final Arrival: Kazakhstan Adoption Story

The time had finally arrived. After starting our adoption process in June 2005 our chance to travel to Kazakhstan had come. My wife Shafeen and I were to leave the last week of November and would be arriving to Kazakhstan on December 1, 2006. That same day we had gone to the orphanage in Taldy-korgan City to meet our child to be. The minute we saw him we fell in love and knew he would be the one. His name was Ayan and he was a beautiful boy at 15-months-old, born on September 7, 2005. We had spent the whole month of December in Kazakhstan playing with Ayan and getting to know him. By the time it came for us to leave the country at the end of the month we had officially adopted him. His new name is Hashim Ayan Sabir.

Our second trip back to the country to pick up our son lasted only a week, and as of February 1, 2007 he is finally in his new home. Since arriving, Hashim has learned to walk and has adjusted to his new home very well. He has filled our lives with so much happiness and joy, something we had been waiting for the last 12 years. We couldn’t have done this without the help of Children’s Hope International and their wonderful staff.

Thank you, Children’s Hope!

--Tahir, Shafeen (and now Hashim Ayan) Sabir, NY

Most Stressful, Most Wonderful

Lucas will be 8-months-old tomorrow. We’ve been home from Vietnam for three months and I can’t remember what life was like without him. He has two teeth and is growing like a weed. He’s right around 20 lbs. and was in the 95th percentile for height when we were last at the doctor. He sits up well and acts like he wants to move forward. And to top it off, he normally sleeps through the night.

He is just the best baby ever. He smiles most of the time and if he’s upset, there’s usually a reason. The entire family just adores him. Nana and Grandad barely go a day without seeing him. He loves music and is especially happy when we sing and dance with him.

I’m so happy that I hope to be able to adopt again. Lucas is going to need a sibling or he’s going to be way too spoiled. Hopefully, I can start the process again next year.

Thank you for all your help with his adoption. It was the biggest, most stressful thing I’ve ever done. And it’s the most wonderful thing I’ve ever done, too!

I hope things are going well with all the referrals and adoptions in process now. It’s hard to believe the miracles you work with every day. It’s more amazing than I could have imagined.

Mindee and Lucas Miller, IL

A Part of the Family: China Adoption Story

Two years ago Jia Li became a part of our family. We flew to China on May 17th and on May 23, 2005 Jia Li was given to us to make our forever family. It seems strange for two reasons. First it was like only yesterday that we were in China and making our way to the adoption center… I can remember the waiting (two minutes) that seemed like hours. I remember our eyes meeting and whispering to her that we had waited a long time for her to come to us. The second thing is that as it is only two years; it seems like Jia Li has been here forever. We are truly blessed to have such a wonderful child.

We could not image our lives without her. And in the same respect we think what did we do before getting her? Jia Li is our treasure and we do just that... TREASURE her.

And so on the GOTCH YA DAY of MAY 23, 2005 it is that day we became a forever family. Since that day Jia Li has become an amazing little person. Her insights, her thoughts, her words and her love have grown day after day. Jia Li has helped us become better people…. So join us in saying a special thank you prayer to God for giving us a wonderful little girl with a heart of gold…

--Marybeth, Jimmy, and Jia Imsho, Staten Island, NY