Showing posts with label Russia adoption story. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Russia adoption story. Show all posts

Friday

All in His Perfect Timing: A Russia Adoption Story

God’s timing is perfect. We knew that in our hearts, but it was hard to convince our minds sometimes while we were in the adoption process. A rollercoaster of emotions...our adoption story began in March 2006 after my husband and I attended an adoption seminar and felt in our hearts international adoption was the way we wanted to start our family. In November 2007 on our 8th wedding anniversary we got THE call. What a gift! An infant girl in Izhevsk, Russia, was ready for us to meet her. We would be the first family with Children’s Hope to travel to this region so there were many unknowns.

My husband and I packed our bags and went on the journey of a lifetime. In an orphanage in Votkinsk we met our precious gift. Her name is Ksenia. The orphanage director brought her in the room. She was smiling and looking around at all of the faces in the room. She was and still is a very happy child. My husband described her as beautiful and I couldn’t agree more. We only saw her for a couple minutes that day.

The first trip was very busy with documents and such, but we were able to visit with our daughter several times before we had to come home. It was so hard to say goodbye! The only consolation was that we could replay our camcorder and flip through photos of her, taking us back to when we were together.

We were home for exactly a week when we got the call that our court date was set. We couldn’t believe that our adoption was finally happening!

Our second trip went very well. We visited our daughter for a couple of days prior to the court hearing. To our delight she remembered us from the first trip and it felt like we hadn’t been apart. She was babbling more this time and was crawling even faster.

Court was long, but the outcome was all that we wanted to hear – that she was officially our daughter. After the court hearing the judge who seemed to be pretty harsh during the process, said the books are closed for this hearing and then I couldn’t believe what she said next. She said:
"People do not believe in miracles anymore, but they still happen. This is the first of many miracles for your family. December will be a celebrated month as it is your husband’s and daughter’s birthdays, your adoption day, and Christmas. Winter will be special for you as New Year’s is in January as well as your birthday. Miracles still happen.”
In my heart, I felt like that was not the judge’s words, but our heavenly Father answering our prayers.

The next day we were able to finally hold Ksenia in our arms, not to say goodbye, but to be able to take her with us. Our flight home was five days before Christmas. What a Christmas gift! We are so blessed. We celebrated Ksenia’s first Christmas in our hometown of Fort Worth where she met many of her family. We also were able to celebrate her first birthday as a family in our home in El Paso. God’s Perfect Timing. We couldn’t have dreamt for it to be better. During the process, my adoption consultant shared this scripture with us and it was something that we drew strength from: I Samuel 1:27 – “I prayed for this child, and the Lord has granted me what I asked of him.”

It has been two months now that Ksenia has been home with us and we don’t remember how life was without her! She is a beautiful, happy 13-month-old who loves to sing, dance, and be outside when the sun is shining.

Everyday is a new adventure with her. We learn something not only about her, but also about ourselves. Everyday we thank God for her. Our prayers have been answered in ways we couldn’t have imagined.

--Danielle Riddle, TX

Danielle and her husband Jason adopted 1-year-old Ksenia from Izhevsk, Russia, in November 2007.

Thursday

Executive Summary: Almost Home From Russia

Greetings from Moscow! The Chaffin family arrived this morning from the overnight train from Cheboksary. It is odd to think that coming to Moscow is one step closer to home. We have gotten to know little Mitchell Anton better, and he us. We have had an enriching cultural experience as we eat where Russians eat, shop where Russians shop, go to Internet cafes Russians frequent, etc. After getting the U.S. Embassy immigration work done this week we will be flying home on Sunday the 23rd as planned and take our tour of Red Square tomorrow.

After my last update, several of you suggested that in lieu of the Twelve Days of Christmas, Ward and I were experiencing the Twelve Days of Mitchell Anton as we waited out the court's mandatory holding period in a hotel with a two-year-old. So, without further adieu, I give you the Twelve Days of Mitchell Anton:

Day 1 - one little boy in the family. This was a quiet day at the hotel, where we learned about each other and how to play with our new toys.

Day 2 - two new parents and Mitchell Anton is going a little easy on us, seemingly happy just exploring the hotel room and hallway, and eating hotel food without complaint.

Day 3 - three soiled onesies. Yes, we are 3 for 3 in destroying each outfit worn every day. We bundled up and ventured outside but for only a few minutes, as it is very cold.

Day 4 - four fabric blocks. Earlier this week, Ward bought Mitchell Anton some fabric blocks at the nearby Mega Mall. Today we strapped him in the Baby Bjorn and walked to the mall. He was unfazed and we were thrilled to get out of the hotel.

Day 5 - five stacking rings. Today Mitchell Anton found his voice. His babbling is newly incessant and even loud at times. Most of it is in conjunction with horseplay, literally. He got a toy horse in his first McDonald's Happy Meal.

Day 6 - six ounces of milk. Mitchell Anton drank a small glass of milk today, and seemed to like it so we'll try more soon. This was another quiet day as we happily contemplated that we reached the halfway point of our Russian adventure and have less than a week before we return to Moscow.

Day 7 - seven times a day on average that one of us says "Ya Ni Pinimayo Parrusske," meaning "I don't understand Russian." Then we either point, pantomine or smile dumbly.

Day 8 - eight hours in a regular workshift. Ward and I now do everything in shifts. We eat in shifts, we dress in shifts. However, this shift runs 24/7. The good news is that Mitchell Anton is acting like a normal two-year-old. The bad news is that he is acting like a normal two-year-old.

Day 9 - nine times the same waitress has waited on us at the hotel restaurant. It is called Star Magazine and the food is good.

Day 10 - ten degrees Farenheit has been the average temperature excluding wind chill while we've been in Cheboksary, or at least it feels that way. As Lena, our driver, said in a most understated fashion, "It is very cold in Russia."

Day 11 - eleven points awarded for miracle shot. In basketball, a shooter gets 1 point for a free throw, 2 points for making a shot, and 3 points for a made shot beyond a certain distance. Since it is Day 11 Ward and I decided to award Mitchell Anton 11 points for his shot whereby he flung a piece of bread into my beer mug at dinner tonight. It was an amazing shot. We had authentic Russian cuisine at a restaurant NOT in our hotel to celebrate our last night in Chuvashia (Ward says thumbs up on the borscht).

Day 12 - twelve days of waiting at an end. We are thrilled to be traveling to Moscow tonight after the adoption court documents are processed, but it is bittersweet for MA as he is leaving the place of his birth.

We will let you know that we have safely arrived home, still planning on the 23rd in the evening on Delta. Blessings to you all as you prepare for Christmas.

--Lynn, Ward, and Mitchell Anton Chaffin, currently in Russia, soon home to Tennessee

Wednesday

Iliya’s (and Mommy’s) First Days of School

A hesitant little boy walks in the classroom with his mother holding his hand. He is the first child in the classroom that morning and his mother helps him take his raincoat off. He looks at his teacher, back at his mother, and—realizing that he is here to stay again—his face crumples. His mother bends down to give him a hug.

Mother: It’s okay, you will only be here for a little bit and then mommy will come back to get you. I think you will have fun playing with your new friends. Now...give mommy a kiss.
Boy: (blows kiss at his teacher)

Mother: (laughs) You’re such a cute & silly boy! Alright, now, tell mommy ‘bye-bye’!

Boy: (waves at the teacher) Buh-bye.


That was our morning; Iliya really was ready to go on to work with me and not stay with his teacher. However, that wasn’t an option. Adopted from Russia in July 2007, Iliya was not too keen on leaving his new mama every day. So I gave him one last kiss and a hug before leaving him with his teacher to get acclimated to his classroom. I made my way back to my office and down to the business of wading through more emails and papers that had accumulated in my maternity leave. It was a fairly calm (and productive) morning at work.

The rooms of our daycare are equipped with state-of-the-art observation booths, complete with one-way glass and a listening system. Using the booth as my shield, I checked on Iliya once that morning. After playing in their big multi-purpose room, his class was back in the classroom, and he seemed to be doing okay.

The newness seemed to be a little stressful for him—he would play for a couple minutes, become serious, cry for a few seconds, play for a minute, be serious for a few seconds, play, cry...and so on. But his cries didn’t seem to be a really tearful cry; he just really had his serious face on when I was observing for those few minutes. His teachers were paying attention to him—talking to him and engaging him in play.

When I went to pick Iliya up after his lunchtime, most of the other kids were napping, and he caught sight of me as I walked through the door. He grinned the biggest grin, called out to me, and began dancing in circles before running up to me. It was precious. But I had to tell him to “shh...” because all the other children were trying to sleep!

As the week progressed and Iliya realized the permanence of school, drop-offs became a little more difficult before they got better. Although he didn’t want me to leave in the mornings, he would calm down rather quickly and would be so excited to see me in the afternoons—a sign of his solidifying attachment.

We have thoroughly enjoyed having Iliya in our family. He is a blessing to us in so many ways—ways in which we never imagined! As it turns out, child care has been a good thing for our family. My husband and I are both able to work in jobs we enjoy while Iliya is also playing hard and improving his social and language skills. We have a great child care team working with our family. And most of all, we have a God who is good, looking out for us every day.

--Melissa Bridges, Alabama

Sunday

A Tomboy Gets Her Boy

“I’d always wanted a little boy, ever since I was a little girl. I was a tomboy and always into sports,” says Lori Willis of her decision to adopt Jonathan as a single mom.

While Lori was in the process of adopting Jonathan from Russia, she eagerly anticipated playing with and getting to know him. When she brought him home to Texas in 2005, he was just shy of 2 years old. “He’s into all boy things—trucks, wrestling, sports, riding his bike—and he’s not afraid of anything.”

“We just recently went to a carnival, and even though he’s now only 3 years old, he rode in the haunted house with his grandpa; his 9-year old niece wasn’t about to set foot in there! At the kiddy-land water park, he went down the adult slide with me. We went down three times in a row!”

“He’s a real jokester. He’s cute and he knows he’s cute. He loves to perform—but only when he wants to, not when I want him to.”

“He’s a very good boy, and very wellmannered. I am teaching him to say please and thank you. Sometimes he needs to be corrected, but he is a very good boy. In two weeks we will be celebrating 2 years together—he’s been the joy of my life!”

—Lori Willis adopted Jonathan from Russia in November 2005.

Pictured: Jonathan Willis is one special guy. When not showing his love for superheroes by pairing Spiderman pajamas with a Batman costume, he’s on adventures at the Children’s Museum and Sea World with his mom Lori in their home state of Texas.

Thursday

A Bigger Plan, God's Hand: A Russia Adoption Story

We have truly seen the hand of God at work in our lives. In 2002, after only two years of marriage, Jeff and I learned that having biological children would be nearly impossible. The day we received this news we felt that our lives would never be complete; little did we know that God had a much bigger plan.

During the summer of 2004 God began preparing our hearts for international adoption. It seemed that everywhere we looked we saw couples in different stages of the adoption process. Each time we talked to one of these couples God dealt with our hearts and gradually opened both of our hearts to adoption. By the fall of 2004 Jeff and I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that our first child was waiting for us in Russia. We had no idea how we could afford to adopt internationally but we believed that God would provide a way. Although we were scared to death about the financial aspect of adoption we stepped out in faith and began our adoption journey. Many times throughout the adoption process God showed us that His hand was on our journey as He blessed our finances.

Jeff and I had decided when we began the adoption process that we would be open to a child of either gender that was under the age of two. Although I knew I could love a son as much as a daughter, in my heart I dreamed of having a daughter. I never fully verbalized my desire to have a daughter but God knew my heart. I also longed to have a tiny baby so that I could rock her to sleep, hear her first words, see her first step, etc. We fully expected to become parents to a boy since more people seem to request girls.

On August 18, 2005 we were notified by our social worker that we had a daughter waiting for us in Tver, Russia. I could hardly believe the words I was hearing…a daughter!!! The initial information we received was that the referral was for a little girl who was nearly 2-years-old. We were also told that she had been classified as special needs. When we learned why she was classified as special needs we knew immediately it was something we could handle and we immediately told our agency we would like to travel to Russia to meet this little girl. My heart was floating for a week because God had seen the secret desire of my heart, a precious little girl. The following week we received a surprise phone call from our social worker. They had received additional information about our daughter. Somehow a mistake had been made and we found out that our soon to be daughter was actually only 10-months-old and she only weighed 9 pounds. Once again God saw the desire of my heart. I was going to be the mom to a tiny baby girl. I wouldn’t miss any of her ‘firsts’.

In September 2005 we traveled to Russia to meet our precious daughter. When we arrived in Tver we learned that our daughter’s given Russian name was Natalia…which is very similar to my name!! We spent two wonderful afternoons at the baby home getting to know our daughter. We fell in love immediately and couldn’t wait for our final trip to Russia to make her our daughter forever. On November 11, 2005 we were legally declared the parents of Alexandra Natalia and we were allowed to pick her up from the baby home the following day.

Since that day in November our life has been filled with so much joy because of Alexandra. We have rocked her to sleep, we have heard her first words and seen her take her first steps…all of the things we longed to do as first time parents!

In 2002 we had no idea why God would allow us to experience the pain of infertility but today we understand that without infertility we would have never explored international adoption and we would have never found our beautiful Alexandra. We feel so blessed that we were chosen to become parents through international adoption; it has been the journey of a lifetime. Thank you so much for helping us make our dreams and the dreams of so many others come true!!

--Natalie Morris, MO

(Jeff and Natalie Morris adopted Alexandra Natalia Morris from Tver, Russia in November 2005)

Friday

Top 10 Things Learned, First "Mama-versary" for Russia Adoption Family

Last year on this date we arrived home with Delaney! What an incredible year with an incredible baby girl! Within about 30 minutes of being home, she had toys and shoes everywhere, tried to open the kitchen cabinets, hugged/tugged the cat, re-programmed the remote and made herself right at home. I can't imagine life before she came!

To those of you waiting...your adoption will happen and you will be with child soon!

Top Ten Things I Have Learned as a Mom ~ Year One
  1. Anything you SAY can and will be repeated.
  2. Baby proofing? HA!
  3. Any toy or object can and will be used as something other than its original purpose.
  4. Cats don't like to drink from a sippy cup.
  5. Anything you DO can and will be repeated!
  6. Two year olds like to lock doors.
  7. Every word to every Wiggles song, every word to every Ralph song, the entire Sound of Music score, the entire score to Mary Poppins, every note to the Jeopardy theme, and all the words to Three Dog Night's "Joy to the World".
  8. Broccoli has excellent trajectory.
  9. A bath can bide you enough time to make a phone call and/or have a glass of wine!
  10. No matter how it is said, whined, shouted, screamed, yelled, whimpered, whispered...."Mommy" is the sweetest word in the world!!!
--Cynthia Ramsel, CA

(Left) One year after Delaney became Cynthia's daughter through Children's Hope International adoption, they celebrated their "Gotcha Day" with swimming at a kids-only water park. Afterwards, Cynthia gave her this turtle sandbox gift. It was a huge hit!

The Miracle Story of Little Andrew: Russia Adoption Story

Ben and I had been on a mission trip to Russia a few years ago, where we worked in many different orphanages. We had said right then....if we can't have kids, we'll adopt. Well, it ended up taking longer to get pregnant than we had hoped. Then shortly after we did finally get pregnant, I miscarried. We were heart broken over our loss.

It was a few weeks after that time when we were driving down the road that I said to Ben, "Why do we have to wait 'til we know if we can or can't have kids in order to adopt?" It kind of hit both of us, and we immediately started checking into agencies. We knew that adoption was what God had planned for us. There was a little boy out there who needed us. We then came to realize that if we wouldn't have miscarried, we would not have thought of adoption at that time. We knew that God had a plan. I was so excited; I could hardly sleep at night. It was like I was pregnant all over again.

So the paper chase began, and we just kept praying for the little cutie that was waiting for us in Russia. When our referral call finally came, we were both beside ourselves with joy!!!

Our journey to see our little sweetheart was amazing. When I first saw him, all I could think was how tiny he was. He looked more like a baby than a 17-month-old. He was just adorable. We both fell in love with him right away. All he wanted for us to do was to hold him and cuddle him--we, of course, gladly obliged!!!!

The medical we got was filled with lots of Russian diagnoses. The Russian medical stated: "prenatal encephalopathy, syndrome of delay of static-motor functions development, delay of psycho speech development, hypotrophy of 2nd degree, progressive period, synechia of foreskin, rickets of 2nd degree, remain effects, post-vaccine allergy."

We still knew right away that he was the one for us. We knew that he needed us. We consulted with some trusted medical professionals and felt very comfortable with our decision.

The goodbye was horrible, but knowing that we had to leave in order to come back made it like a step in the process to check off. Four and a half months later, we finally got to go back to bring our little cutie home.

But when we first saw him on our second trip, both of us were shocked. He was even skinnier than before, and really looked like he had given up. He was just like a rag doll. When we would lift his arm up, it would drop down as if totally lifeless. It really broke our hearts. He hardly smiled, and just wanted to be held. They kept saying to us how serious he was. We were so thankful that we were actually going to be able to bring him home this trip.

Well, the day finally arrived that we got to pick up little Andrew from the baby home. There really was an immediate change. Soon after we got to the hotel, he started smiling and laughing. It was amazing to see. By the time we got to Moscow, he was like a different kid. We could hardly get him to sit still. It was almost like he had been cooped up for so long that now he wanted to take in EVERYTHING. It was too cute!!

Now that we've been home for 6 weeks with Andrew, we just look back in amazement. It is like God performed a miracle right before our eyes! Upon arrival to the U.S., we took Andrew to the doctor for a thorough evaluation and received a "clean bill of health". He is now such a happy child, full of life and humor. He makes us laugh all the time with all the faces he makes and the cute things he does. He is definitely not serious anymore! His whole countenance has changed, and he has gained over five pounds since we've been home. Within two weeks, he started walking and then running. We are praising the Lord for His goodness to us. He gave us an amazing gift in our little Andrew.

The story isn't quite finished yet...we found out that I'm pregnant!!! God knew exactly that we needed Andrew, and that Andrew needed us. It all had to happen this way. God is good ALL the time!!!

--Christina Wagner for the Wagner family, TX

Thursday

You Must Really Want That Baby: The Adoption of Amelia Olga Bush

“You must really want that baby!” our young nieces exclaimed after hearing our thorough responses to their numerous adoption-related questions. At first, the girls’ questions were simple and easy to answer: Are you adopting a boy or girl, how old will he or she be, have you chosen a name yet? Further into the discussion, the questions became more complex: Why are you adopting, will you ever get to meet the birthmother, how will you tell the baby about his or her adoption?

We learned from the girls how to answer the tough questions that adoptive parents often face. More importantly, our conversation with the children reaffirmed we did indeed want “that baby” more than anything in the world. The baby for whom we had waited so long, a lifetime in fact, would soon become one major fulfillment of God’s divine plan for our lives. Although our amazing adoption of Amelia Olga commenced in September of 2004 and finalized in June of 2006, our adoption journey began long, long ago.

As children, the idea of adoption was planted in our hearts and minds by the stories from Christian missionaries. In college, I traveled on a mission trip to Monclova, Mexico, where I assisted in the building and refurbishing of a children’s camp. There, I met sundry children who were living in extreme poverty. Many of the children were orphans.

A year after my mission trip, I returned to Mexico to attend an intensive Spanish language program in Guadalajara. When Greg came to visit me, I pointed out the need, and he instantly agreed that we needed to do something to help less fortunate children.

Post graduation, we married and discussed having our own children. How delighted we were to find that we were both pro-children and pro-adoption! Although we were open to having children naturally, we agreed that we would adopt at least one child. One of our missions was to “to care for orphans in their distress” James 1:27. To “defend the cause of the fatherless” Isaish 1:17, was our calling. It was no coincidence that God had created a passionate desire to adopt in both of our hearts and then brought us together so perfectly!

Understanding that God’s hand, although seemingly invisible or intangible at times, was working busily in our lives helped us immensely as we trekked through our twenty-one month adoption of Amelia. When we submitted our initial application to Children’s Hope in September of 2004, we expected our adoption to be a relatively quick process of less than a year. Unforeseen events, however, began to occur. Our home study took longer than we had originally anticipated due to circumstances beyond our control.

Then in December 2004, Russia put a hold on international adoptions. We couldn’t believe our adoption would be delayed. We were so ready to meet and bring our child home. Little did we know this pause would be exactly what we needed. In those months of waiting, I lost both my oldest sister and my grandmother. This unscheduled and underappreciated “pause” turned into a great blessing for us.

By the end of May 2005, Russia resumed the adoption process, our lives had become more settled and optimistic, and we had submitted our dossier to Russia. Only days before we mailed our paperwork to Russia, unbeknownst to us at the time, our little girl was born in a small Russian town. God had the exact child chosen for us, and we would have to experience even more “delays” until she was available for international adoption; per Russian law, baby Olga had to remain on the Russian database before her availability status could change from domestic to international. We, in turn, had to wait out shifts in adoption policy in three different regions of Russia.

Our dossier first went to Chelyabinsk, a town in the Ural Mountains. Although we were excited about adopting from this historic location, we decided to transfer our dossier to a brand new region for Children’s Hope, one with only two other waiting families. Two families, in our mind, meant a quick referral. Our consultant at Children’s Hope informed us of the risks involved in adopting from the new region, Ulyanovsk, but we decided that the risks were worth taking. After our dossier remained in Ulyanovsk for approximately six months, Children’s Hope strongly recommended we move our dossier to Moscow or Astrakhan due to Ulyanovsk international adoptions policy changes. Although we were sorely disappointed by the news, we found strength in knowing God was in control of our adoption. After much prayer and consideration, we chose to adopt from Moscow.

Within a month we got the call! On April 22, we traveled to Russia and the next day we found out that our baby was a girl and we unquestionably agreed to meet her. On the way to the orphanage, we held hands and whispered quietly to each other, “We are finally going to meet our daughter. This is it!”

That day we discovered love at first sight really does exist! On the way back to the hotel from the orphanage, we held hands again but this time exclaimed, “She’s perfect! Beautiful! So sweet! We’re the luckiest people alive!”

While in Russia we existed on pure adrenaline resulting from the love we immediately felt for the soon-to-be newest member of our family. A week later we bid our sweet baby farewell, told her that we would see her soon, gave her lots of love and hugs, and sadly sojourned back to the U.S. to await our court date. During the six weeks between trips (Adoptions from Russia require two trips), God continued to bless us by showing us clearly that we would definitely be able to afford one parent to stay at home full time with Amelia. The timing of our adoption was impeccable!

After our court date in Russia, we immersed ourselves in our daughter’s culture by spending our ten day waiting period in Kolomna, a small town two to three hours from downtown Moscow. To stay in Kolomna was perhaps one of the most rewarding decisions we made regarding our adoption.

In addition to being able to see Mila (a Russian name that we have chosen to use as a shortened form of Amelia; the nickname appropriately means “dearest” or “sweetest” one) every day and getting to know her much better before the long trip home, we grew to love Russia and its remarkable culture.

We learned to communicate with and truly appreciate the wonderful and beautiful Russian people. We rode the buses to and from the orphanage, toured the historic buildings, strolled through the parks, and shopped in the markets. We ate the local cuisine, and we enjoyed the live music outside our hotel. We learned the Russian way of ordering food at McDonald’s: the employee holding up the flag will assist the next customer. We never again underestimated the importance of saying please and thank you in Russian.

One of the Children’s Hope Moscow translators spoke of us as being “so brave,” because we willingly ventured alone into a small Russian town, one in which English was almost nonexistent, on our own; we are so thankful that we did! We will always have the memories of our child’s hometown to share with her. On July 1st, after three extraordinary weeks in Russia, we entered the U.S. as the proud and highly elated Bush family of three.

The last nine months have proven to us that we should always rely on and have faith in God’s sovereignty; He is in control! We simply cannot imagine our lives without Mila. Every day with her is a testament of God’s abiding love for us.

Our adoption has educated us on how to persevere in difficult times: to trust God, to lean on each other, to find comfort in family and friends. It has also taught us to appreciate the process, to “be still and wait” happily; we have learned to enjoy the moment and place in which we currently are.

Most strikingly, adoption has shown us the great distances (literally and figuratively) to which we will go for love. Our adoption has given us grateful hearts. We are very thankful for God’s (not our!) perfect timing, for the unwavering love of our friends and family, for the tremendous support from our church and community, for the careful and considerate assistance of the Children’s Hope staff during all stages of our adoption process, for the strength and contentment of our marriage, and for our beautiful and precious daughter.

As one of our nieces recently stated, “Mila is a blessing to our whole family!” We can hardly wait to adopt again!

–Greg and Gina Bush, GA

Green Light Go!--Russia Adoption of a Child with Hearing Impairment

When Hans Denis Graser was born, he was delivered with fluid in his lungs. Doctors in Russia diagnosed pneumonia and administered the appropriate antibiotic treatment. The drug’s effective dose was to be given over a period of time gradually, but in error the drug’s full dose was given all at once. In little Hans, the resulting action caused nerve deafness.

As is the custom for orphans in his region, Hans stayed in a baby hospital his first year, completely deaf and unable to hear. Ninety-nine percent of his life was spent in his crib and the little boy was given one diaper change a day. Upon graduation from the baby hospital, Hans moved to a “baby house” where he was unlikely to be adopted. His caretakers labeled him severely deaf and developmentally delayed.

“I’ve always thought Special Needs strictly meant mentally and physically handicapped kids,” says Heidi Graser, new mom to adorable “Jack” a.k.a. Hans Denis Graser.

“When I found out Russia considers deafness, cleft lip and cleft palate, burns, and things of that nature as special needs, I thought, ‘Those are not special needs! Those are fixable, workable maladies.’”

As a single prospective mother, Heidi took all this into consideration. Although it would mean additional personal attention, the more minor special needs Heidi felt she can handle. She applied to Children’s Hope International on December 1, 2005, choosing her country, region, age range, and the special needs she was open to. Her main goal—to find the one child with the slimmest chances of finding a home. She told her adoption coordinator, “I’m very well traveled. Send me where people don’t want to go because it is too far away.” She had the place—Vladivostok, nine hours by plane from Moscow.

Within the region she selected, Jack was the only child under 3 years of age afflicted with any of the special needs she was open to.

For Russia, you travel twice: once to see the child and verify your decision to adopt; the second, to attend court and finalize the process. Heidi began her first trip on April 13. Before leaving she took every single day, thinking, “Do I go or not go.”

“It wasn’t so much, ‘Is he right for me?’ but ‘Am I right for him?’”

Although she hoped it would not be necessary, knowing she had options was a great relief; if she and Jack were not a match, she could always return to the States and await another referral.

“I was prepared for Jack to be stone cold deaf. I had to get into that mental state before I traveled on that first trip.” What if it was more than she could handle? Would it matter if he could never hear her? What if the orphanage did not disclose his entire medical history and his development delay was due to another cause?

Heidi had never known anyone with a hearing impairment. Filled with doubt she consulted her adoption coordinator, family and friends. Talking through it got Heidi through it.

“We’d set up a pro and con list. He might just need hearing aids or implants, and we can always use sign language. We always had one or two positives to knock out the negatives.” Heidi explains, “You have to wrap your mind around it. My sister is pregnant right now, high risk. And I realized I could’ve given birth to a child with a hearing impairment or a child with a cleft lip. Would I love them any less? No, of course not, he or she would still be my child.”

In her first couple of days in Moscow, Heidi was overwhelmed with how to communicate with Jack. When he looked in her eyes and she in his, she saw there was no need to worry.

On the third day, after holding him emotionally at arms length, Heidi fell under Jack’s spell. Five months later she returned and took him home as her son.

“It’s so much easier than I ever thought it would be. That I was scared to even go meet him...seems silly now. It was the fear of the unknown.”

Now Heidi knows the unspeakable joy a child can bring. Tears well up in her eyes when she speaks of how Jack loves her. Communication is no problem. “He talks to me; he tells me what he wants. We communicate with looking in each other’s eyes, giving hugs, with kisses and pointing.

“Seeing a smile on his face is the best action without words. That’s how he says, ‘You’re mine.’”

Developmentally, Jack caught up quickly when given personal attention. Although his caregivers in Russia meant well, they never knew his potential. Jack is already developmentally on track with other kids his age.

Heidi’s pediatrician referred her to a multitude of resources for a child with special needs including home care, special tutors, First Steps, and Parents as Teachers. Jack now attends the St. Joseph Institute for the Deaf in St. Louis and sees professionals in audiology and ENT.

By the time Jack came home, Heidi had studied sign language. Jack picked up many words within their first month together. At first he stumbled down the stretch of her hallway, but now Jack runs giggling. After three months at home, he has been fitted for hearing aids in both ears.

“When they put the hearing aids in I wasn’t expecting him to hear anything. Snapping fingers, water—every little bit that he can hear is like a miracle to me.”

These aids work in preparation for the cochlear implants he will receive by April or May of 2007, the all important surgery which will effectively replace the nerve that was damaged upon his birth. Amazingly, Jack’s surgery is covered 100% by Heidi’s insurance and her employer is covering all deductibles.

Jack will have the opportunity to be everything he is meant to be.

“I’m looking forward to the day when Jack calls me ‘Momma’, but when that kid comes running across the room to give me a kiss, holding both sides of my face—that is better than any “Momma” word ever. We share a bond that is unbreakable.”

--Heidi Graser, MO
Written by Jennifer Newcomb, Children's Hope Communications Coordinator

Monday

Happy Family of Four, Russia Adoption Story

We feel so fortunate to have the boys as part of our family and it's still hard to believe they are really here - in our house.

Things are starting to level off at the Cramer house. The boys have adjusted wonderfully and were back on their orphanage schedule within five days of their arrival. The only real stressful part still is meal time. Food still freaks them out. Sometimes it's peaceful, and other times (like today at lunch), it's rather high pitched. Amazingly, they are already using the potty (when I put them on it, because they can't walk yet or tell me when they have to go). At nap time, they put their heads down immediately (I mean IMMEDIATELY) when we put the pacifier in their mouths. They dance at the start of almost any sound, including the power drill and Bruce pounding on the piano (he doesn’t know how to play).

They already know how to do "high five", clap when I yell "YEAH!", and they understand “no-no” pretty well, too. Everyday it gets better. You should see how cute they play together. It is as if they have a dimension of their own that no one else can see.

--The Cramer's, MN