A Merry Christmas to All

During our 2.5 year wait for Nate, the holidays were the hardest for me. I kept thinking, "Will this be the year we get to see Christmas through the eyes of our child?" The answer was always "no"...until this year. We have much to be thankful for and the biggest thing is bundled in a 23lb package. This is how God answered our prayers for a child...

You prayed for help when we found out we needed $15,000 in adoption fees. He answered your prayers by providing us over $16,000 in just 3 months! He went beyond that by bringing many people together during the fundraising weeks.

You prayed that our baby would be healthy. Through Children’s Hope, God gave us a BEAUTIFUL, healthy 10-month-old boy. He is in the 90th percentile for height, is average weight for his age and the worst he had was a little cold.

You prayed that he would adjust to his new life easily....God answered you by helping Nate bond to his dad immediately and adjust to his new home within 3 weeks. He never had night terrors or bad reactions to new food... He enjoyed being with us and has slept through the night since day one.

You prayed that WE would adjust to our new life as parents... God gave us an easy child...a fast learner who helped us get into a routine quickly, professions that allowed us to be with him, and understanding/ patient friends and family who helped us during those crucial first few weeks.

Even through the long wait, Nate came to us at the right age, at the right time in our lives. Any sooner and we would not have received him. Not that we wouldn't have been happy with another baby...but we are glad that we have our son. He was worth waiting for.

I am so excited about Christmas this year. As I was unpacking all our decorations, I came across the stocking holder that we had bought over 2 years ago for our expected child. Each year it sat up on our mantel empty, but this year, it will hold our new son's stocking of goodies.

He is the best Christmas gift we could have ever received. And because of that, we named him Nathaniel, which means "Gift of God".

--Don & Denise Sullivan, AZ

Pictured on the left: the Sullivan's son Nathaniel. Pictured on the right: Denise Sullivan as a baby in 1968, during her first Christmas. “Now, almost 40 years later, my son gets to celebrate his. And wouldn't you know it? They still make those little Santa suits.”

“I Have a Sister and She Lives In Ohio”: A story of adopted twin sisters reunited

In spring 2005, while on my daughters’ municipality web site, I noticed a photo of a girl who had a very strong resemblance to my daughter Hayley, especially since Hayley does not posses the regional look common for that area. Leah’s mother had also noticed the resemblance between the two girls and we contacted each other. For the next 17 months we sent photos, emails and videos of the girls to each other. We also talked on the phone but never mentioned our suspicions to the girls that they could be related. For the longest time whenever Hayley saw Leah’s picture via email she thought it was herself. Hayley’s younger sister would point to the photo of Leah on the computer screen and say “sissy”.

We were cautious in thinking that the girls could possibly be siblings. We knew if we were actually lucky enough to find our child’s sibling there would be many issues involved in the discovery and what it means to them, to our family and the sibling’s family. This would be a long term commitment. You do not get to choose the family that has adopted your child’s sibling. It may or may not be a compatible match between the families. Once you’ve made the connection, you can’t go back and pretend not to “know”. We had to consider how our children would feel about the discovery of the relationship and, in our case, how Hayley’s other sibling would feel about this relationship.

There are also significant financial and lifestyle concerns with finding a sibling and maintaining the relationship. DNA testing is not an exact science when it comes to establishing sibling-ship when you can not test at least one biological parent. You need to be able to live with less than 100% conclusive results and accept negative results with grace. There are many skeptics when it comes to finding biological matches and many parents have been attacked for choosing to test their child. Both families took the responsibility very seriously and discussed many issues before proceeding with the DNA testing of the girls, including what score from the DNA results we would consider conclusive, and we set the bar high. I also did research on DNA testing and talked with other families that had also found their child’s’ Chinese sibling before embarking on this journey. This journey is not for everyone.

Both families felt comfortable with going ahead with the DNA testing of the girls after establishing a relationship over the past 17 months. Family members also saw striking resemblances between the girls, not only in their appearance but in their personalities, likes and dislikes. We chose a lab that tested 19 markers using the specific Asian Database from the region that they are from. After a LONG two week wait in May the DNA testing was 98.2% conclusive that the girls are siblings! The girls birth days are eight days apart (one actual and one estimated because one daughter was given up one month after birth) so currently we know that they are sisters but feel comfortable in thinking that they are fraternal twins. It will take additional testing to conclude that. The girls refer to each other as “sissy”. Both families were thrilled with the news! I knew in my heart that the girls were sisters. We feel blessed to know that Hayley has another sister from China and both families have made the commitment to nurture this relationship.

A trip was arranged to have Hayley and Leah meet in September 2006. Leah’s mom had asked Leah what she wanted to do with Hayley when she came to Ohio and Leah said, “Take her to see Lake Erie and JUMP on my bed!” When I asked Hayley what she wanted to do while in Ohio (not knowing Leah’s response) she said, “Have a pillow fight!”

The girls chatted excitedly on the phone about the upcoming trip. Hayley made a countdown calendar to count down the days until “Sissy Day!” When Hayley and Leah met for the first time in Ohio they hugged, giggled, chased each other and ran through the airport like they were best of friends and that they had known each other forever. The six days that Hayley and I spent in Ohio with Leah and her family was the beginning of a wonderful, blessed journey for both families. The girls acted silly, sang songs, had tea parties, wrestled, jumped on the bed, had their pillow fight and got to know each other.

We were amazed at the similarities between the two girls but also saw some differences. Both families got along very well and Hayley and I were welcomed in to Leah’s family with open arms. We were lucky enough to meet Leah’s extended family and friends while we were there and everyone was excited and happy for the girls. It was fun trying to trick family and friends by swapping Hayley for Leah! Strangers would ask if the girls were twins.

Saying goodbye at the airport was met with sadness as the girls wrestled one more time, pretended to call each other on the pay phones, said their “I love you’s” and hugged goodbye.

Since we have been home the girls have remained in contact with each other, they talk on the phone, send each other emails and pictures and think of each other often. Hayley really wants to go back to Ohio to play in the snow. The girls have a bond that will last a lifetime and it has only just begun to blossom. It is a true miracle and double blessing that the girls have been reunited with each other once again.

–Kathy Wong, AZ

Better with One Eye

We are the proud parents of three beautiful little girls. One of them is named Aliana Minfang. She was born in China, with two hands, two feet, two ears, but only one eye.

We had known for some time that we wanted to adopt a child. It was very clear to us—somewhere in the world a child was meant to be our son or our daughter. We were looking for a child that no one else wanted, for millions of children worldwide are not adopted because of age or medical conditions and our hearts lay with these orphans. These precious ones are known as Waiting Children.

During the four and half months of dossier preparation, a new list of Waiting Children of China was made available. We were drawn to Aliana, a 2 year old girl born without a right eye. She had been abandoned two days after birth, taken to an orphanage, and at 3 months of age transferred into foster care. No other prospective parents were reviewing her. Our excitement peaked!

We asked our pediatrician to evaluate her medical file. He cautioned, it was not uncommon when one or both eyes are damaged in utero for the brain to also be affected. This little girl could slide anywhere down the scale—she could be perfectly normal or developmentally disabled. Our doctor’s comments definitely brought us back to reality.

The medical information from China was insufficient to make a conclusion one way or the other. We were scared of the unknown and questions plagued us: What if she was mentally retarded or unable to live independently? Did the other eye have good vision? What was the long-term prognosis for her sight? Was she really meant to be our daughter?

We asked God for guidance and received an indisputable sign. I opened my Bible, after a day of fasting and praying, and my eyes immediately fell on a passage, Matthew 8:19-20 which begins, “It is better for you to enter life with one eye, than to have two eyes and be cast into darkness. Do not look down on one of these little ones, for I say to you that their angels look at them and continually see the face of My Father who is in heaven.” Well, I guess that took care of that—there was our sign!

We agreed to adopt Aliana. Although our fears were not laid to rest, we decided we did not need to be sure of our knowledge, but only of our purpose.

Nine months and five days after we submitted our initial application, we met our little girl. All our fears disappeared. I know every adoptive parent says this, but it is true—it was just obvious she was meant to be our daughter.

We had been afraid of the unknown. Once you are looking at a living breathing person, the abstracts go away; instead of a possible condition you see a child.

Now we are home. Aliana is a funny, loving, smart, stubborn, snuggly, and bouncy sweetheart of a girl. Her foster family did a wonderful job preparing her for the transition to her forever family. She has bonded beautifully with my husband and I, is imitating both the obedient and the mischievous actions of her siblings, and initiates play with all of us.

Aliana is an integral part of our family. We can't imagine having any other child in her place. Although, she will have ongoing medical issues with her missing eye, we will deal with those. We realize now, one never knows what will happen in any child’s future with certainty and that gives us peace.

--Velleta Scott, AR

The Scott’s intend to adopt another wonderful Waiting Child in perhaps 2 years (Velleta’s husband says 3). The Scott family includes two biological children Dorinda and Callista, ages 4 and 2 respectively. What can you as a family handle? In the next Children’s Hope International newsletter, lay aside your fears as you read about more family victories over medical issues.

We Are the Lucky Ones!

It's five o'clock in the morning, and our house is quiet and still. As I sit folding laundry, I lovingly glace up at the portrait of our three beautiful daughters hanging on the wall. As I look at it, I have a difficult time remembering what our lives were like before them.

The journey to become the fortunate parents of these three children began in 1998 when we contacted Children's Hope International. We quickly began the process to become the parents of Grace Meiying Callesen (now 7). We brought Grace home in 1999. We soon realized our family was not yet complete, and we once again began the adoption process.

In 2001 we traveled to China to bring our second daughter Sophia Mei Di home (now 5 years old).

Our lives were full and happy but somehow we always had the feeling someone was missing from our family. CHI once again assisted us in bringing our youngest daughter Ava Lian Margaret home in 2004 (Ava is now 3.).

International adoption is a very complex process. CHI has the ability to take this very complex process and make it virtually seamless. From the very beginning, working with Marianne Adams, our adoption coordinator, we felt a sense of confidence and ease. We had frequent contact and updates regarding the process of our adoption. Once in China we were met by employees of the CHI branch in China. They accompanied us the entire trip. We felt secure and informed. The staff was extremely knowledgeable regarding the adoption process. We were supported in every way imaginable. When we left China we felt we were leaving friends!

We are always perplexed when people approach us and tell us how lucky our children are. Our response is always the same, "We are the lucky ones!"

Our children are thriving. They are all incredible little beings. They are inquisitive, intelligent and beautiful...but most of all they are loved.

--Mark and Heidi Callesen, Arizona